Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
when "blow-job jen" drunk dials you at 3 in the morning, you answer
ill do whatever it takes for me to get more high and eat pie
How do we turn this unicorn pinata into a bong?
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
Go big or go home. Or get a live in house boy you met 7 years ago and feel like you have unfullfilled potential. You know, the usual
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
I lose my morals, my dignity, and my selfie stick :(
I want to see a guy holding a pizza and a bottle of scotch and a box of magnums. I'm a simple woman.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
I would ride that face into the sunset
She left a cookie cake on my porch, and the frosting reads "I'm sorry". She left me an I'm-sorry-for-punching-you-in-the-face cake.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize