i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
Btw before you ask, the dr said there's no way shoving his dick that far down my throat is why i got laryngitis
Called my dealer in tears and we talked for an hour until I felt better. That's the way it should be.
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
I just sold my hat for three car bombs. I call that a win.
I think once you know a guy's chest measurements the stalking has gone too far..
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
in fetal position in his closet not sure if he knows im here... hugging his spongebob cake pan i stole.... now please come find me..
The only words I could make out were "Dicksmash McIroncock".
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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