Taking a 35 year old indonesian home, only in vegas ;-)
the cure to his relationship is in or around my vagina.
dude. late night with jimmy fallon isnt even funny. the people in the audience there to see him dont even think hes funny.
kinda like you and your friends.
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
Just found my DARE notebook from 6th grade. Extacy was starred and highlighted.
At least I've made one childhood dream come true
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
i dont know if you remember blowing your vomity nose directly into my hand...yeah thanks for that
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
The swelling on my elbow and tongue means I may have cockblocked myself.
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
Update - might be back in your neighbor's good graces. She liked the framed photo I gave her of me on the tractor with my business out.
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
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