38 yer olds are good kisserssss
It was so romantic--he turned me around to face the sunset during doggy-style over the couch back.
Going to Kmart high is like jumping in a time machine back to the 80s
yea i came on her face and told her to bring a snorkel next time
I just realize today that I've dated three guys this year with their own blog. Ugh that's embarrassing.
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Dude. The girls called me over to see what they had in their dorm. They snuck in a pigeon in a cardboard box. They named it Quincey. They swear they're sober.
I've been alternating between telling people I was mauled by a bear or hit by a car to explain the massive unexplainable bruise on my leg. Slightly more worried now that the car idea is believable.
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I was just randomly reminded of the night you were wrapped up in a bed sheet carrying a full bottle of cookie dough vodka and warning neighbors of the weirdos running around
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I just wanna know if were done hooking up so I know of that condom he left in my top drawer is fair game
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Last 4 google searches: class c felony, scary ghosts, peanut butter jelly time, Lindsey lohans vagina
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