Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
Now have a vodka water and get your shit together
Alright, my brain isn't sure how to properly function on a Wednesday with no hangover and more than 3 hours of sleep.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
And some neighbor just saw me naked and hunched over a bag of potato chips stuffing my face. Maybe clothes aren't a bad idea.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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