Dan just whipped out his wang to piss in a milk jug! Hello weekend.
after a month anything with tits is on the radar
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
Ever had blood in your semen? I am guessing that's a problem.
It's a big world.....someone has to fuck it.
Sorry for my penis texting you last night, I can't control what he wants at 4am.
Think of this as an opportunity. Like Jesus just opened up his closet, and inside is an endless supply of huge, beautiful cock.
He was so drunk and proud of his 6-month-gym-results he actually made me touch his whole naked body.
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
ive decided that just saying "yes" when people assume I am something other than Caucasian will highly benefit my love life. last night I was native.
I'VE LOST MY DIGNITY, MY PRIDE, AND EVEN MY BOOTY CALL. HAPPY THANKSGIVING.
im going to smoke a cigarette and reflect on my life choices
You can accomplish quite a bit with a can do attitude and a well placed ice cube.
Randomize
