she started talking about my kids
was she topless?
Glad I put on jeans. You could measure my ass sweat with a rain guage.
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
like teasing for 28 minutes, then the very last 2 minutes is where is ALL goes down. I'm talking, rings off, stable sitting position, hand job madness.
she puked ON me while she was on top, worst holiday hookup ever
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
It doesn't feel like real life when you open your hotel room door and the first person you see is wearing a rabbit costume. I'm too hungover for this.
Do me a favor and don't mention him I feel like Regina George and I just want to scream I made him
after what u told me last night I think we're past the wtf zone and at this point u should just join me in wondering if my barista lover is a gay porn star
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
I don't intentionally mean to ruin relationships for personal gain but. Yeah nah I totally do.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
I think everyone at the office can tell I'm dehydrated
you mean still drunk
I've heard it both ways
Dear Andy-the problem is not that I slept with your girlfriend, it's that you didn't know she's a lesbian.
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