JACOB AND UGLY BROKE UP
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
driving around with you guys listening to the beach boys made me very concious of how white you all are.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
I have surprise drugs for everyone
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Although, I did get to see a Raiders fan and his toothless girlfriend get roughed up by the police and dragged out of the stadium. So the night wasn't a total loss.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
Just saw a car towing a guy on skis drive by so that’s how Syracuse is doing today.
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