He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
I didn't slap you in the face. TEQUILA slapped you with my hand...
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I just watered my plants with apple juice. Look what you made me do.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
He sent me a picture of his dick with a cowboy hat on it.
do you know how hard it is to walk a mile drunk on 151 it's hard yards are soft and every girl looks good
fun fact #6 about tuesday nights: giving head with two 40s taped to your hands is not as easy as you would think
I'm bringing cupcakes to work today as an apology for my actions at the bar last night, my boss probably can't look at me the same ever again
When have we listened to the rational side of either of us?!
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
just had an acid flashback in my therapist's office. i am a walking stereotype
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
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