its like his balls were made of silver and he was trying to polish the tarnish off
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
I swear she's a drunk klepto...by the end of the night she had stolen 3 bowling balls. HOW DO YOU STEAL 3 BOWLING BALLS?
I think that was him coming out to me. I just brushed it off
We decided it was acceptable to walk out of class on a quest for Doritos. That high.
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
I will never use my dick in anger. With great dick comes great responsibility
Already drunk, almost got in a fight with a bunch of irish chicks. And another with canadians. On my way to get a tattoo. I plan to regret this trip.
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
i know were having a "heart to heart" right now, but does it make you feel uncomfortable that im sexting someone right now?
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize
