Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
Just woke up from a dream where you lived in a gingerbread house on a snowy cliff by the sea. The dolphins were swimming away from a giant dust storm. You REALLY ought to smoke this before bed tonight.
He went down on me while I had rollers in my hair. I've never felt more like a lady.
Because you stood over the Ice luge screaming STONE COLD and poured beer on everyone
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Damn you and your marathon penis with its superhuman capabilities
Let the record show that the first hour of my twenty-first was spent shooting tequila ans discussing the emotional integrity of werewolves.
I have aggressive nipples.
I'M TRYING. TO WATCH. PORN. PLS HAVE UR IMPORTANT DISCUSSIONS ELSEWHERE FUCKERS
Would you be so kind as to inform your husband that my truck is forever cursed by mashed potatoes and it's his fault.
Nope. I'm an adult now. I can successfully avoid to vomit in defiance of the porcelain god\n
I watched my wife kick balloons while wearing thigh highs. It's not a sentence you get to use too often
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