Boobs. All I remember is boobs.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
Just made a photo collage of the girls I've hooked up with this summer. I'm patting myself on my back right now
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
No you can't have a vodka redbull. The pilgrims didn't have vodka redbull.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
He just kept yelling "body massage machine go" at random intervals throughout the night
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
He wanted to drink hypnotic from my butt crack. I need to move out this state.
Please make sure you have solid number of friends around you that wouldn't be afraid to break a bottle and stab someone. If you're planning on drinking all of that, you're going to need a safety net.
Did you know that pizza hut has a wedding proposal box? And sorry for being kinda drunk yesterday when you got here
After my second liter of German beer, nothing D-cup or larger is safe near me.
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
If this gives you any indication of my current state, I stopped at Meijer after work and bought funyuns, pregnancy tests and chocolate.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
