I forgot to tell you the best part. The folded up paper he wrote his number on opened up to be a picture of him when he was younger wearing a Columbia tshirt in front of NASA and in pen said his name and "space consultant."
I think u should go home and go to bed. If u get arrested in the Ohio river u go to jail in Kentucky. Nobody wants to go to jail in KY.
This guy in a neck brace is ordering bottle service at the strip club. Not sure whether to applaud his commitment or scorn his addiction. It's a draw.
Well I almost walked away with an Irish guy's boarding pass and some south guy's dignity
I had to explain to my dentist that my tooth was chipped because we designated my mouth as the official way to open beer. I feel like our level of partying is no longer socially acceptable.
he asked me to lick his asshole and I told him his girlfriend could do that for him
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
If we order a pizza and I contribute 9 cents, is that fair?
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
I hate when he takes the condom off to cum all over me. It defeats the purpose.
It’s like having a barf bag and choosing to puke in your own lap.
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