I don't think you know how difficult it is to pee in poncho..
its been so long since i'vebeen laid i've forgotten what a penis looks like. When a guy makes me hot i picture him finishing the job by whipping a multi-setting showerhead out of his pants.
what if every blade of grass was a penis?
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
still drunk. talking shit to the doc drawing my blood. this has no upside
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
he shit on the floor last night i'm not venturing down there
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
Kinda hard to look your partner in the face the day after a rousing game of How Many Ways Can I Capture Your Penis.
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
I feel fine lol. I tried climbing a tree but the branch broke and I got arrested.
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
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