Something clean will definitely be barfed on tomorrow.
let's bang
You're in my phone as 'Weird Bus Guy' so I think my answer's no.
He was actually able to throw up in the bucket from the top bunk. im impressed.
im the poster child for why you shouldnt play beer pong with wine.
Just transferred the sun chips from that obnoxious Eco-friendly bag into a zip lock. Fuck the environment, that bag is loud.
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
This is davidson friend mat i an drunk. Thank you for having a physical relationship. With David. I bet he gas a penis the size of an elephant tusk. You are a lucky lady.
Listen. You seriously only live once... there aren't that many cinco de mayos left until someone knocks u up and u have to have a shotgun wedding. Man up.
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
Just please don't close your legs while I'm down there again. I don't want my death to be labeled as "Head crushed while giving an individual cunnilingus".
I just wanted a bootycall and now somehow I'm at his parents playing dominoes. But they have tequila so it's cool
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
When campus security rolled up he stole their car and drove it like 100 feet. Then he walked up and gave back the keys because it was a hyundai.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
My ex's sister asked me to be her date to Thanksgiving. Should I go?
Threesome!
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