After she swallowed she let out a hurge burp. No BS. I'm the cock of the walk.
I think you have the wrong number. But at any rate, respect.
She said she didn't have time to shave "there"
Then she shouldn't have had time to order the lobster.
i'd like someone to explain to me why my clothes are all sticky. including my fanny pack. yes, this is a mass text.
not allowed to tweet this cos she's following me but i definitely just got head in a stairwell of the university of chicago. wanted you all to know.
After me and my boyfriend broke up I had to resist the temptation to send a mass text to my booty calls saying "thank you for your patience. it will be rewarded."
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
it was a whole new experience in the world of ball fondling
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
Would it be rude to use my vibrator? like he forfeited his right to be mad when he left me orgasmless...right?
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
