Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
he matches the description of mystery hookup #2, 4, and 7
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
If he tries to stick his thumb up my butt again im going to rip his dick off with my vagina
I told you those kegels would come in handy one day
If I have to go to the hospital, at least put my pants back on. It's been a fantastic night.
She has this wild look other eyes like she wouldn't be afraid to commit a felony.
Urgent. Do not ignore. What does this "=$" shit mean. Quality foreign dick is at stake here
Serious question: does drunken cyber sex with a stranger on omegle count as cheating???
So who left their underwear on a lamppost in my aunt's backyard
Did we actually play with swords last night or did I dream that?
There's nothing classy about a pregnant girl at a frat party...remember that.
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