we were holding hands throwing up into the same garbage can; if thats not true love i dont know what is .
I wish i had more things to dip in ranch... That's the most stoner thing i've ever said
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
Church parking lot, park bench, front porch. I think she's more comfortable going down on me in public. May have found the one.
hey at least you are getting hit on, i spent all day researching cat sedatives
Update: tequila girl had her hand down groomsmen pants
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
whatever, tonight I’ll be getting my ass eaten by an aussie so we good
my dad just built a flame thrower.. you should probably get here
I'm the only person I know that carries solo cups, shot glasses, ping pong balls, two decks of cards, and a lawn chair in his trunk. I'm ready to turn anything, anywhere into a party.
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