woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
Professor used "ROFL" while grading my paper... Do I even go to a real college?
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
I mean its not the first time I passed out drunk at barnes and noble.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
FULL ON LADY WOOD. YOU CAN SEE THE VEIN
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Thanks for having me and my emotional baggage over last night.
One of the annoying girls in my 7 AM class showed up drunk for her 21st birthday and just auctioned off her fake ID.
i asked him to talk to me in french while we fucked and halfway through i caught the word 'lasagna'. turns out he was making his grocery list.....i asked him to keep going.
I sang Seal's Kiss From a Rose to my quesadilla
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
I was told i took a shot doing a headstand in the backseat then proceeded to barf all over my face
I had no idea you were so talented.
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