p.s. you have a small clit
YOU ARE THE MOST AWKWARD PERSON ALIVE.
I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
Your boyfriend and I are bonding over your giant dick.
He was literally going down on me and giving me a foot rub AT THE SAME TIME. What more can I ask for?
Now that it's fall I have to prepare for the imminent arrival of ripped up sweatpants shoved into folded over sequined uggs
You have not lived until you've slid down a waterfall fucked out of your mind. Fact.
I woke up naked with a duck on my head. I think something went horribly wrong.
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
idk how many shots you took between 2:39 and 3:05, but your message went from "Please text me tomorrow." to "Why you sto textom?"
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
I stared at his dick and then told him to get on his knees
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
