We ran out of things to say while we were playing Never Have I Ever so we started playing I Have Done This... Have You?
She was indeed spoonfeeding you potato salad out of that giant bowl with a giant spoon. Dont feel special, she was giving it to everyone that left the bar.
she fucked me tho cuz it was her cat's birthday. As soon as we were done she just says "ahhh tequila tuesdays"
I just sat there and watched paula deen's face melt for an hour.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
All I know is I was bleeding, she was bleeding, we stole someone's Lucky Charms, and then I made you guys order a pizza
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
Not only did she fulfill a life long dream of mine of banging in a library, she bought me subway for lunch. I feel like I got the best gold star ever today.
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Drunk me just want to text sober me for saving that half rack of ribs I loves you
Just discovered I was so fucked up last night I called in sick to work... TWICE
None of what you just said was coherent
I just bought wine at a gas station what the hell do you expect
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