Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
I just saw a neon sign in a bar window that says, "open to Public" but the L is burnt out.
Woke up in an unfamiliar basement in a sleeping bag with Matt to a police officer shining his flashlight in my eyes and asking me my birth date and social security number. My morning went swimmingly.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
I'm in the library if you wanna come give me library head.
I don't see why you're so upset, it's not like you were wearing pants either.
Woke up with a migrane, threw up blood, then my headache went away. I'm going to convince myself that it was just a bad batch of blood so I can drink again tonight
Something's wrong. My throat is definitely not in it's normal spot. Way too low.
YOU CAN'T BASE A RELATIONSHIP OFF A PENIS
I LIKE HIS TONGUE TOO.
I took the weekend off because he and I were supposed to go to Vegas for our anniversary and get a hooker remember?
Ah, yes. Who says romance is dead?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
He told me to keep watching the Grammys and then went down on me.. I think I'm in love.
I was just seen throwin up on the bookstore building near a trashcan by parents. Naturally I throw a thumbs up and say go college
Randomize
