A little boy walked by his parents room one night, looked through the keyhole, and said "and that bitch tells me to stop sucking my thumb!"
either we just had an earthquake or I am really good @ masturbating
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
you have no idea how wierd it is to get nudes while talking to grandma
she's just sitting here eating cilantro out of my herb garden and watching some show about ducks on tv and laughing, what the fuck did you give her?
Is it weird to say that getting an std with you was kinda romantic?
Out of all the people in the house to show their tits at mcdonalds to try and get free food, they picked those two?
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
Testing the emergency boobs hotline
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
i just took a huge shit in old main. i think my college bucketlist is finished.
He may be 6' 6" but I'm 180 lbs of pure rage and determination
Your girlfriend agreed to a threesome, I saw dogs in a bar. It seems life is falling into place for us
not only did I call my ex crying but drunk me also deleted the phone log so I had no warning when I saw him in class
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
