Last night is one of those stories you hear about on 20/20 right after they make a law banning 90% if what I did.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
if my spotter knew I was listening to the Wicked soundtrack on my iPod, I wouldn't even be mad if he dropped the barbell on my throat
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Once I saw his penis, I knew I made the right choice
I feel like banging her is an expected thing. But banging you would be like getting a 36 on the ACT.
i was beyond wasted so he tucked me into bed and wrapped the blankets around me like a burrito. then gave me a bloody mary and an omlet when i woke up. and who says living with your cousin is a bad thing?!
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
Post walk of shame: realized the underwear I put on when I left was another girl's underwear.... woof
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
So you can now add nose to my list of places that cum has gone that it shouldn't...
Randomize
