Tittie bar + Mother In law gone = mission accomplished.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
We're lucky we aren't prostitutes by now. Whats the etiquette for returning a pair of heels with blood on them?
I'd appreciated it if you didn't lick my boyfriends face again. I'm askin nicely. Thank you.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I got hammered with my chem professor at 4:30. I'm pretty sure that can't be topped by any real sort of institution.
I don't remember, but I believe your goodnight phrase was "nice meeting you, thanks for not macing me"
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
Hook ups at LEGOLAND don't count right?
Are we playing inappropriate sexual encounters bingo?
I mean I'd assume the strange looks are on account of the fact that I'd imagine people normally don't stink of booze on an 8:14am flight.
It's only 10am and I doubt my day could get much worse. During my 9am meeting I had to sit between my boss who I fucked for my promotion and the guy he walked in on me fucking on the copier
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
Basically we had a threesome in one room and a fivesome in the next room. Its what I like to call a win win situation.
How was it?
i think i smell bacon but im to sore to walk downstairs. that kinda night
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