Don't come here someone got drunk and rolled the keg to buger king. no more beeer
I feel fat after drinking my meal replacement shake.
I added chocolate sauce, a bsg of m&ms and a crushed up brownie to make it taste better.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
I was so drugged up it was amazing, I felt like a dinosaur "because I enjoyed spinach, and I got apple juice and only dinosaurs get apple juice" according to me the day of, and last night I felt like a rocket ship
I put on slutty clothes under my normal clothes, im like fucking super slutwoman
Best superhero ever to exist
Is the Chairman of the College Republicans throwing upon your toilet right now? 'Murica!
I think I used my NERF gun during sexual roleplay. Need to re-evaluate my life choices.
After that time I came to the conclusion that jeeps are the best cars to have sex in
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
Does your Fitbit monitor your liver failure?
We broke up. My life is now 7 inches less.
Interesting, I was always told to run away from crazy, but you seem to think we should run towards them dick first.
Dude, someone puked in my washing machine last night, I tried turning it on to clean it...not a good idea
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
Randomize
