oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
I really wish I could go back in time to change the course of events that led to me sitting on the internet at 3 Googling 'Traumatic masturbation' while talking to you about failed dates, and running a virtual restaurant in a video game.
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
just crush a couple of percocets into it. tell him sam adams came out with a new beer. flavored with sleep.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
is that a crab cake on the shelf with the dvd's....?
Frozen waffles and wine. Loneliness-party of one
Wow it must be so difficult to be as popular as you are and smoke as much weed as you do
I biked home blackout drunk last night, but I have some memory of throwing my bike in a rage when I couldnt get it down the stairs. No idea on the bright orange puke in the sink.
We are gonna have a bake sale and the preceded will go towards the abortion
I have this theory that your highest awareness of how drunk you are is while you're sitting on a toilet
Where is everybody?
It's pretty much split between the strip club and jail.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
I am drunk and aggressive about the olympixs
It's spelled Olympics
I wanna print it out and hang it on the fridge like parents do with good report cards.
oh the joys of a picture of a negative pregnancy test
Randomize
