dude, my face is all kinds of fucked up right now. and don't even start with i told you so...
so tomorrow. i'm thinking coinstar then adderall?
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
i deep throated a ruler to see what my limit was...
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
Your first mistake was thinking that you could get through the day without drinking a single bottle of alcohol. Your second mistake was wearing shark boxers.
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
I just want to trace his tattoos with my tongue
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