I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
My parents came down to check and make sure I wasn't into any mischief then proceeded to give me alcohol.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
I want Paula Dean to narrate shark week next year
how did the keg end up in the top bunk?
You took a bar mat shot.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
I'm getting drunk by myself again. But I'm not shotgunning any of them. That's self-restraint, right?
I only had ten dollars. So leave it to Katie to somehow makeout with the bartender, on his shift mind you, and get free drinks.
Drunk me commented on almost all of her pictures. My favorite one is titled "be as the sea". My comment is "cold, rough, large and letting anyone come inside you. you accomplished." Guessing I'm not invited to the party anymore.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
Hey what you doing tonight?
Working at the hospital! So hurt yourself and come visit :)
See you in about a hour
Jack said he hasn't jerked off in like two weeks and he's like a smoldering volcano who wants to bury you like Pompeii with his man gravy
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