Wanna demo a makeout? Check box yes or no. Or maybe. Okay bye.
I want to have your abortion
If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
The dentist told me I have super glue on my teeth. I'm not blaming you I just want to know how that happened
Remember how I haven't seen my step sister in like 7 years? Pretty sure I just made out with her...
Gotcha. Well, I'm puking and trying to keep down water from a mug that says "love the moment" around the rim. Not loving this particular moment.
The only thing I remember is vomiting and then feeding my dog a Mcdonalds cheeseburger and telling him yolo
Fuck you come back. The old guy next to me is complementing me on my great choice of ring fingers,
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I was full on naked standing in his room and I just said "this isn't me" and left.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
You have my heart. You only share my vagina.
He said "I can't believe I had sex with a cat lady". Am I flattered or is this a new low?
to be fair i didnt know she wanted to sleep with me
WHY THE FUCK ELSE WOULD SHE DRAG A STRAIGT MAN INTO A VICTORIA'S SECRET CHANGEROOM GODDAMMIT
Randomize