Pretty people don't get stds, I knew it
too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
Its like a 4.5 hour drive but there's drinking involved so I'm destined to go
I don't know at least half of his name. I have officially become a statistic.
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
as much as i want to say no i cant cause i need the trophy wife training
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
his teacher called to say he gave a girl on the playground a rock to touch his penis. proudest moment of my fatherhood
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Woke up at 10 with bourbon being shoved down my throat and him yelling, "shot train! Don't be a bitch"
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
My vagina is glad I'm back at work because it needs a vacation after working all through my vacation.
Are you sexting with minion stickers right now?
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
Sorry, Geoff can’t come to his phone right now. He’s outside trying to show his dick to a bachelorette party bus with “DTF” written on the windows
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