Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
i just saw a man dusting the fake palm trees at the mall
...welcome to nebraska
Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
thanks for celebrating my birthday so severely 2 years ago. i just found your hospital discharge papers in my closet.
anything for my little brother.
I just found pizaa roll in my hair. Already been to class today
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
My black heart of coal cannot compete with your boiling crock pot of teddy bears, rainbows, 90s music, and the good candy you get from rich people on Halloween.
Why is there a muffler in the livingroom?
First, I just want to say that I had nothing to do with it. Second, how good is your car insurance?
I shall welcome him into my body with an open liver and completely lay down all chance of resistance. Sweet Zeus, please take me to Mt. Olympus and share all that is divine. I promise, the secrets will be safe with me
He whispered "Are you feeling it now Mr. Krabs?" when he was inside me. That is NOT my fetish.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Hey, thanks for not calling the cops when I answered the door naked, high as fuck, and covered in red velvet cake batter.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I don't know who's idea it was to get wine for a frat party but my poor pitiful hung over self really fucking hates them.
He's the one named Andrew. In his profile picture he is the one on the right in the monkey costume.
Randomize
