i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I mean, there was frosting being put on a tunafish sandwich. Pretty sure she knew we were high.
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
seriously when did my vagina become a soup kitchen for the poor
doing laundry. just found my fishnets from Friday. the ENTIRE crotch is torn out. guess that answers the "did we have sex in the cab" question.....
Kristy will be communicating through my phone. Due to her current blood alcohol level, the laws of Pennsylvania, Erie county, and common decency have deemed that she is no longer permitted to have her own phone.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
I ran into my boss at the liquor store on our lunch hour we both just stood there awkwardly until i was like your car bar or mine hahaha we both need a cab
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
For the sake of being nice I congratulated her and she replied with something along the lines of that I need to stay away from him and not touch him ever. I really wanted to be like "been there, done that" but my New Years resolution was to not start any cat fight over boys with small dicks before noon
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
It's dollar drink night and I have my honors society initiation tomorrow. Somehow I think this will not end well.
I'm doing my drinking workout. 20 pushups for each beer I finish. I should write a fucking book
Randomize