And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
what is it with giant penises always finding me
Just went through campus. In the span of 2 min I saw 4 places I've had sex. And thats just down one street. Man do I miss college.
this just proves how much faith i have in "us".. what should we be for halloween..?
is it sad that i can honestly say it was the best birthday sex i've ever had and it was still terrible?
I just took the cheapest shot in your honor
Not blacking out at our finals party is my Everest
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
I let a blind guy feel me up. All he kept saying was "oh fuck yeah!"
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
WOKE UP NEXT TO A PLATE OF MEATBALLS HAPPY MONDAY
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Randomize
