Of course we end up in a gay bar... And I have to tell you there are some hot dudes here, should I pass around your Facebook?
Loo but I'm already drunk TINIGHT! CAPS ATTACK
last night i got mauled by 2 gay men who were trying to make each other jealous by making the other think they could swing back- you're going to love atl
you sent me the whole alphabet, one letter a text. it took 15 minutes to read them all
New moon trailer came on. Theater booed. I love these people.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
Definitely got a blow job in Charles Schwab's bed last night.
I love my job.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
I'd be 10x more excited if going out didn't require pants or the general giving of fucks
He looked me deeply in the eyes and said "I don't want this to be the last time I see you.. Can I follow you on Instagram"
omg how embarrassing to not hear the delivery person knocking because you're singing "where are you Pizza" to the tune of "where are you christmas" too loudly
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
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