he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
eating kraft dinner with my face. no forks.
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
I wish there were birth control emojis
You'll get a boner for sure
Way ahead of you. Kinda awkward while paying rent but hey
Touche. Dude, I fastened garters. Drunk. I deserve a medal from a drag queen.
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
They've already turned me into the Dean of Students once because they felt 'unsafe' because I came home hammered and asked one of them to make me a grilled cheese sandwich. Like, I just ASKED!
Is it bad that I want a job purely so I can buy drugs with without feeling like I am sacrificing my future?
Why do you think I have a job?
Today is National Blunt Day in the Great State of Me. Come ovah
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
I got a lap dance last night from a girl while I was wearing a Captian America onsie. My life does not suck.
I fucked a French man last night. 5 Times. Ashed my cig in his cactus. That later set on fire while we were having sex.
apparently ive been in a long term relationship for the past 1 1/2 years w/ out knowing
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