my girlfriend just informed me I need to get tested and so do you
girlfriend?
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
He literally sends me dick pictures, EVERY DAY. SEVERAL DIFFERENT ANGLES ..it's like I GET THE POINT.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
I am undressing in in n out. They migit ca5l security. Are you provn d6 me?
OH MY GOD. SO PROUD.
I'm eating those little wheels of cheese and watching storage wars, this is the opposite of sex.
I am not betting on the failure of any friend that is not you.
Dude, all I know is that I came out of this thing wearing a snorkel mask and completely covered in glitter and soap.
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
I was going to say "wearing plaid doesn't make you gay, I wear plaid!" but then... heavy sigh
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
