Sometimes when i'm at a cross roads in life, i think about what i would want my lifetime movie to show what i did
what about "I will fuck you for a jamba juice" do you not understand?
So currently I have a block of cheese duct taped to my air conditioner in lieu of a fridge.
she said she was living bicuriously through me.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
It looks like I colored my belly button red at some point
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Just thinking about this summer makes me feel a slight tingle of an orgasm mixed with a twinge of regret as the cold ghostly feeling of multiple hangovers creep into my body.
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
I am mentally ready for anal.
The guy next to me on the bus has one hole in his jeans that has over 20 mini dicks drawn on his leg. Classic.
i ordered what the bartender said was called a pink cock, and kept saying it tastes like a disney princess. thats how my 21st bday went
You made me promise I wouldnt let you play "fuck fuck goose" with a 40 year old ever again.
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