He has that thing where they hang SUPER low
Ewww!! Elephantitis
so i asked him why he doesn't wanna see me anymore and he said he was questioning his sexuality. cool.
They threw me out of the bar because I was arguing business ethics with the owner of th bar
She said that I needed to "pregame her so it can slip right in."
the first sign of life we got from you was four hours later. you smiled without opening your eyes when tom whispered in your ear we were getting buffalo wings.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
There was a reason that "Throat Warrior 2011" was written on my martini glass. He said my title was undisputed.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Can I color on your dick again?
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Who in their right mind would frost a cake with their butt?
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