you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
Too much gin, very little bucket
I just got a high school volleyball teams practice cancelled because I slept with the head coach through their practice time.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
I really am. The stoner chick wants to get a python.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
You need to stop me from lighting my hand on fire next time we're working
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I got back and Katie was asleep holding a burrito. I woke her up and she ate it and passed back out.
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
So do I get to ride the beginning of the November stache or what?
SCOTCH AND CIGARS AT THE TITTY BAR. YOU ARE COMING WITH US.
if it wasn’t 100% before, it is now that i will most definitely die a quesadilla related death
We still on for Manwhore Monday?
Randomize
