Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
my mom just found my bong and asked what it was. I told her it was a hookah
and she bought it?!?
yeah...but her friends at work told her hookah was fun and now she wants to smoke it with me...im thinkin yes
if i found out she had a dick after i got head, does that still make me gay?
he was grinding on you and dedicated the song "I'm in Love With a Stripper" to you then started taking his own clothes off
dude. this chick is staring at me like i gave her brother herpes.
If there was a saddle on his sack, she would ride it.
We watched scrubs, then I got a shower blowjob which led to shower sex and the living room floor sex. Now she's baking cookies. I may not be studying, but I'm doing something right.
Drunk you needs to learn how to call sober me, so sober me can talk your drunk vagina down.
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Cookies and nudity, all you need in life
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
I just bought two cartons of ice cream, 5 boxes of mac and cheese and a bridal magazine. Don't judge me.
For some reason, my alarm clock was unplugged & in the kitchen microwave. I don't remember doing that...
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
Randomize
