I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
I taped Calvin and Kyles heads together face to face while they were passed out. You should have seen them stumbling around using hungover teamwork trying to find scissors.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Was she always missing a tooth or am I just now noticing it?
These bubbles make my penis feel like it is resting on clouds.
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
I think when your throwing up on the highway on the way to pick up your mom from the airport is a sign to slow down.
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
you said it was a life or death situation, being your partner for beer pong doesn't count
Promise me if ever I think I can't do anything, remind me that I waxed my own butthole
Randomize
