We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
not my fault hes the one that tried to cuddle after. said he wanted to spoon away the shame.
He once got bit in the face by a dog and still got laid the same night. He owns Memorial Day Weekend
is it possible that there's a used condom holding pennies in my bra? I'm so confused on what happened last night...
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
2 things: 1) can you get hep from toilet water? And 2) do you know where we can get a new skillet for cheap?
Please tell me those aren't related.
I made rice.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
well don't blame me. sometimes vibrators go missing and people get angry. these things happen
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
You have talents. You got me laid two weekends in a row in two different cities.
It was just a matte of pubes and mustard.
I paid for lunch, then he made a bunch of holes in my wall and destroyed my bathroom.
I'm really stressed out right now.
I think you're confusing "stressed" and "sober".
Randomize
