im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
he screamed my twitter name while we were having sex.
Well, ive pounded a baby into a stripper and a girl who was on jerry springer, a 16 year old is logically next.
I'd like to come home and be able to sleep in a bed that's not filled with crumbs from you getting too high and passing out while eating. This is seriously getting ridiculous.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
I can't tell you details but at one point I had her pee strapped to my back in a ziploc
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
I just got attacked by a swarm of butterflies. Nothing is okay anymore.
My dad just accidentally taught me how to make fake IDs. I love my life.
somehow getting chased by a bulldozer was NOT on my to-do list for today. just saying
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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