Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
I woke up with spaghetti in my mouth
it's great music for shaving your balls
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I made out with Jen. We were naked. I'm still gay. Forever
I was masturbating with the shower head and someone flushed the other toilet. Pretty sure I have 3rd degree burns on my clit.
I think he's hit rock bottom. You know it's a low point in life when you cry because you weren't invited to sit in a box car and watch porn with two other straight dudes.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
I just spilled my beer on a five year old. She's crying but I can promise you I'm more upset.
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
Might call you tomorrow on a drunken hate filled rant, or just a normal hate filled rant, either way be ready.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
