It saddens me that girls will never know the wonder feeling of pulling your sweaty nutsack off of your leg.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
you told me your penis was albino and it couldnt be exposed to light so you needed to keep it in me
She threw her promise ring on the ground, that's when the freak came out.
I swear if his heart was half the size of the cum stains he's left on my sheets we would have the perfect relationship
Was rudely woken up by strangers at 4:15am. I was leaning against the stoplight at 9th
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
No more. You can't have nice things, and vodka is a nice thing.
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
I just moved my 11am hair appointment to 8am so I could blackout at noon. Who am I?
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
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