I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
I felt weird they were both staring at me waiting for the scoop on how your vagina felt.
It's sore actually
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Just because it's been in my vagina doesn't mean it's important to me
I want to bury your face in my vagina. Possibly by force. I will try not to suffocate you though.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
I am expending an amazing amount of energy to not throw up right now
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
I think my ball sweat smells like waffle house. might be time to change up drunken eating habits
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Why are your pants in the freezer?
In other news, my ex fuck buddy is a surprisingly good wingman.
Just flash them and yell "JUDGE THESE BITCHES"
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