They should really pass out barf bags in church
i made it my goal to pee in the sink of every apartment we went to last night. i didnt use the toilet once
are you excited because you wanna see me or because you wanna get laid?
bc i get to see you. naked.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
Just started taking liver support pills. Welcome to Senior year.
My liver is crying. And I feel like I got fingered by Edward Scissorhands. While he was wearing brass knuckles
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
He laid on the ground 100 ft from the car crying about how he just wanted to be home already
Awareness is good for change and all, but ignorance is bliss. I like bliss.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
