Do you not remember dry humping your dog for 20 minutes at oxfest dude?
Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Then we started crawling around on the floor because we couldn't get up so decided to be tigers instead. Gotta love power hour.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
note to self..putting cheap vodka in a bottle of grey goose does not make it taste better
Promise me that if I become one of those sad people that facebook pesters you to 'reconnect with' you'll tell me so I can delete mine and save myself the humiliation?
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
you handed the cop a condom last night and said "it's all about protect and serve right?"
the size of his penis is telling me NOOO! but his bank account is telling me YESSS!
she always winds up in the cupboards its nothing new.
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
Last time I "ran into him" I ended up with the clap and had to explain why the ladder was missing from the garage.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
Randomize
