i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
yea..i want to get out of new york for a bit too but for the love of god not to new jersey. that's like getting tired of the stripclub and getting yourself a toothless prostitute.
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
failed my one goal of the day: wake up before 2 pm.
He literally is quoting that 21 questions song, the 50 cent one. oh my god.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Never again. I promise. My old gay body can't handle that much adrenaline twice.
When you hit the 45 minute mark of any argument about The Flintstones, you have to realize: it's no longer you arguing, it's the cocaine arguing.
Why do the people I hook up with still exist after we're done?
I think I sprained my soul last night
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
Dude the tree smoked with me. I planted the roach with it and smiled.
Dude I introduced the hot Russian girl to the hot Ukrainian girls. I am a UN ambassador
Please come pick up your twin. She's tap dancing in her underwear and that's not how you want yourself represented.
Randomize
